Things I Learned on the Cruise...

Alrighty, I'm back in Top City, and I didn't have anything better to do (taking down Christmas decorations, unpacking, and doing laundry are not important...)... So I thought I might as well share my musings from our cruise! Prepare yourself, though, these are tiny little nuggets of wisdom that may or may not change your life.

1. The City of Miami is my long lost home. As of yet, it has not replaced Portland as number one on my "future places to call home" list. But it is definitely up there. However, Tyler thinks I will have problems with the summer. Apparently I am not a pleasant person when I get sweaty? No idea what he is talking about...

2. I have a problem with carbs. A big problem. Let's just say I would never last on the Atkin's Diet.

3. The people may be speaking another language, but it is totally obvious when someone is getting their butt chewed. That's universal in any language.

4. Tervis cups are a lifesaver. Apparently comparing myself to a camel was inaccurate (thanks, Tyler)... So maybe a fish would be more accurate. Whatever it is, I love my water. And the little tiny baby cups will not cut it.

5. If I thought I walked funny on land, you ain't seen nothing 'til you watch me walk around a cruise ship on choppy water. I mean, I didn't even need to get drunk. I just always felt the effects. Heels were a particularly unique challenge.

6. Working on out on Deck 11 is a special kind of torture. Man. See number 5 regarding walking. And times that by two.

7. Bring more stretchy pants. So much food. And cutting back on it is out of the question. So I'll just pack more stretchy pants. Lots of elastic. And drawstrings.

8. If I lived in the Eastern time zone, I would not be able to watch late television shows live. They would always be DVRed. Who really stays awake until 11:00pm for that? I mean, I LOVE Scandal. But I would just have to wait until Friday to watch it. Nine 'o clock central is late enough.

9. Who even thought one-ply toilet paper should be manufactured? Honestly. Horrible idea.

10. I am ready to go back! Any time. So if you go, take me. Please.